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Letters from Lake Wobegon

On Squirrel Accounts

December 27, 2025

A note on the audio: Matt insisted I record this letter aloud, which he says is "so much better" than just reading it on a screen, a claim I dispute on both aesthetic and practical grounds. The written word has served humanity for five thousand years. It doesn't need fixing. But Matt is younger and believes in podcasts and "content" and other things I don't fully understand, so I indulged him, and now there's a recording of me reading this letter that you can listen to if you prefer.

The trouble is, we did it in rather a hurry—he caught me between breakfast and my second cup of coffee, which is not my best hour—and I'm told that in certain passages I sound either mildly intoxicated or perhaps overstimulated, like a man who has had too much whiskey or too many of those pills that truckers take to drive through the night. I want to assure you it was neither. I was simply undercaffeinated and trying to read faster than a person ought to read. The voice you hear is the voice of a man who was promised this would take five minutes and discovered, halfway through, that it would not.

If you'd rather just read the letter, I completely understand. That's what letters are for.

Dear Karyn,

Well, now. I'm sitting here with my coffee—second cup, which is one more than I usually allow myself, but it's the day after Christmas and the rules are different—reading your email and feeling the particular satisfaction that comes from knowing someone actually listened to what you said. That doesn't happen as often as you'd think. Most of the time you say things and they float off into the ether like steam from a hotdish, and nobody's the wiser. But here you are, curled up by the fire, getting smarter about money while everyone else is out fighting for marked-down sweaters. That's the Norwegian way. Let the others scramble. You sit by the fire and think.

A million dollars squirreled away. I like that phrase—squirreled away—because that's exactly what it is. Squirrels don't make a big fuss about their acorns. They just tuck them here and there, and then winter comes, and they're fine. You've been doing the same thing for years, apparently, and now you've got a nice pile of acorns in various trees around the yard.

On the Squirrel Accounts

This is exactly the kind of thing we were hoping you'd bring to us. The Vanguard account, the Wealthfront, all of it—Matt and I want to look at the whole picture before we start moving things around. One of the mistakes people make with money is treating each account like a separate problem to solve. But they're not separate. They're all part of the same squirrel, if you will. The same retirement. The same life.

So here's what we're going to do: we're putting together a comprehensive plan for the January letter. Not just the Schwab trust, but all of it—the Vanguard account with its municipal bonds, the Wealthfront, everything. We'll look at what you've got, what it's doing, what it could be doing, and lay out some sensible options. That way you can see how all the pieces fit together before you move anything.

In the meantime, don't worry about transferring that RMD just yet. A few weeks won't make much difference, and it's better to have a plan than to rush. The money isn't going anywhere. That's the nice thing about money—it tends to stay where you put it, unlike cats.

On the Great Buy vs. Rent Question

This is a bigger question, the kind of question that deserves its own letter and probably its own pot of coffee. The short answer is: it depends on things we don't know yet—where you want to live, how long you plan to stay, what the rental market looks like in that area, what houses cost, and about a dozen other factors that we'll need to work through together.

But I will say this: there's a widespread belief in this country that buying a house is always better than renting, that rent is "throwing money away" while a mortgage is "building equity." This is one of those things that sounds true and sometimes is true but often isn't, especially for someone in your situation. You've already built your equity. You've already done the hard work. Now the question is: what arrangement will give you the most peace of mind and the most flexibility to enjoy the water?

We'll dig into this properly in January, too. Matt has some spreadsheets he's been working on—he loves spreadsheets the way some people love crossword puzzles—and we'll lay it all out for you.

In Summary

The January letter is going to cover a lot of ground:

That's the news from your squirrel accounts, where all the acorns are accounted for, all the trees are sturdy, and all the returns are about to get a little better.

Stay warm by that fire.

Good night.

— Garrison

(with spreadsheets by Matt)

December 27, 2025